editor It’s never too early to begin planning for your loved one’s retirement, aging-in-place plans, or medical emergencies. If you’ve had difficulty knowing where to start or even getting the courage to involve your family member in this tough conversation, don’t worry. This guide will help you take steps so you and your loved one can have peace of mind knowing their plans for the future are well-prepared in advance. From knowing what documents to have on hand to understanding different care options, we’ll cover everything you need to know in this comprehensive guide.
Importance of Planning Ahead
Most people think of aging as a slow and graceful process. While aging can have its lulls, emergencies such as falls, strokes, or rapidly declining health can leave loved ones scrambling to find care solutions for their families. Planning ahead is crucial so you aren’t left choosing the first, or sometimes only, option for healthcare, living arrangements, or financial support.
But how do you start planning for your loved one’s later years? How can you ensure you’re making the right decision? Here are some things to consider.
Start the Conversation Right Away
It’s never easy to talk about aging or end-of-life decisions, but it’s crucial to have these conversations with your loved ones before they become incapable of making their own choices. Starting the conversation early can help you and your family member think through different scenarios and make more informed decisions.
Know that you might face some pushback from your loved ones, or might get the topic brushed off. Ease them into the conversation with questions such as:
- What do you imagine your retirement will be like?
- Do you think you’d like a caregiver to help around the house?
- Do you know anyone who is considering a nursing or assisted living home? How do they like it?
- What do you want us to do if you become ill and can’t make decisions for yourself?
While these questions might seem a bit direct, they’re soft enough to keep the conversation flowing. They can also start getting your loved one exposed to the idea of planning for end-of-life or aging-in-place options.
Consider Getting Outside Help
From lawyers to doctors, sometimes the push your loved one needs to start planning is an outsider’s perspective. Consider scheduling appointments with:
- Financial advisors
- Estate and elder law attorneys
- Primary care providers
- Funeral home directors
- Spiritual leaders or counselors
- Assisted living center directors
These professionals have dedicated their lives and careers to helping people plan ahead, no matter their age. As the founder and operator of a residential care facility for the elderly (RCFE), I am happy to have these conversations. People in my position can give you and your loved one valuable information on options such as funeral arrangements, creating living wills, medical advanced directives, assisted living options, and everything in between.
Start Gathering Important Documents
In your conversations with these professionals, you’ll most likely get a better idea of what documents you need to have on hand to start planning for end-of-life or aging care. Some of the most critical documents you should keep on hand or in a safety deposit box include:
Personal Identification
- Birth certificate or passport
- Marriage certificates
- Divorce certificates
- Social Security card
- Citizenship paperwork
Legal documents
- Will and/or living trust
- Power of attorney for finance and healthcare
Medical documents
- Medical records
- Medical insurance information
- Advanced directives and living wills
- Medication list
Financial documents
- Bank account information (checking, savings, retirement)
- Investment statements (stocks, bonds, mutual funds)
- Disability income information
- Debt list and how this is paid
Property documents
- Deeds to property (home, land, vehicles)
Keeping these documents organized and easily accessible can save a lot of time and stress in the future. Ask your attorneys, assisted living homes, or financial advisors what types of documents you should have on hand and how to keep them safe. Fireproof safes, safety deposit boxes in a bank, digital copies in a secure hard drive, or even a folder at home can all be great places to start.
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Begin Solidifying Your Wishes
Once you and your loved one have a good idea of what their wishes are, it’s time to start solidifying some of these choices so you can be better prepared. For your loved one, this may include:
- Prepare a living will: A living will is a legal document that outlines preferences for medical treatment if you are unable to communicate. This can include whether someone wants life-sustaining treatment, such as being kept alive on a ventilator.
- Consider a power of attorney: A power of attorney is a legal document that gives someone else the authority to make financial and/or medical decisions on your behalf. This can be helpful in case you become incapacitated or unable to make decisions for yourself.
- Discuss funeral arrangements: It may seem morbid, but discussing funeral arrangements can help ensure that your loved one’s final wishes are carried out. This can include burial or cremation preferences, as well as any specific requests for the service itself.
- Update your will: A will is different from a living will. A will outlines how your assets will be distributed after your passing. It’s important to keep this document updated as circumstances change.
- Speak with assisted living facilities: Schedule tours and start financially planning for moving into assisted living homes, skilled nursing facilities, or other care arrangements if your loved one is unable to continue living at home. The sooner you start exploring your options, the more time and resources you will have to make the best decision for your loved one.
Conclusion
Advanced care planning is an essential part of the aging process. Continuously revisiting and updating plans will help ensure that your loved one’s wishes are always being honored. Remember, planning for end-of-life care isn’t just about preparing for the worst – it’s also about cherishing the time we have with our loved ones and making sure they feel supported and cared for every step of the way.
Author’s Bio:
Mark Gladden is the Founder and CEO of Present Moments Senior, a cozy and comfortable home-based residential care facility for the elderly (RCFE) in San Diego. Mark is also a U.S. Veteran who has been serving the recovery community of San Diego for a decade.
